How Does It Feel To Get Cheated On

rbka
2 min readApr 26, 2024

By the ‘love of your life’

There is this thick layer of tissue and mass that’s embedded into my body and soul after all the interactions. All the coexistence. The physical touch. He grew on me. In me. They’ve all done.
I could ponder upon the perspective of looking at them like tumors growing heavily inside of me, or something that was a part of me and building me, forging me into who I am today. Overanalyzing and intellectualizing trauma was not the way to go this time.
I had to rip it out of myself.
All of it.
In this swirl of harboring brutality and bloodlust only seeing red, my eyes remained dry. The crimson has clouded my vision and inflirtated itself into my entire being. I had to learn how to control it. Actually, I should have been grateful at that point for the gut-wrenching experience, as it brought the darkness I’ve had within me to the surface.
I was finally aware of what I would be capable of doing. I’ve seen it all in front of me. Pixel by pixel, unfolding like the blossoming head of a clicker.
Like fungus, the hatred spread in me. Seeing the world through a layer of blood, reciting all the lies and deception. This is the lowest form of manifestation of this existence. Only red.
It was time to remove it from my body. My soul. My spirit.
Hence, I’ve traveled to the heavens.
I stood there bare-naked in front of the cosmos and performed the incision. I scooped it all out. You, and everyone that came before you.

Fuck your AliExpress engagement ring.
Destroyed.

Fuck your lies about your necklace.
Destroyed.

Fuck your Asian whore(s) that you’ve cheated on me with.
Discarded.

Your fetishes and lies about your sex tape collections of women.
Your Nezuko cosplay.
All on fire.

Your lies. All of them. Each and every one.
All is pouring out of me like puss and blood.

Your pervertism. Pedophilia. Necrophilia. Domestic abuse. Narcissistic abuse. Animal abuse.
All burns in the light. It’s all you.

You’re a dead man. You’re not even a man. Never were. You’re somoene who fucks 13 year old minors and hits dogs. You’ve never even existed. You’ve never had a human experience. As I’ve told you by the end; I don’t know who you are. I never did.

Torn asunder. The great cosmos bears witness.

The fate of a vagabond… I guess it’s okay if I smoke a cigarette after all this.

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rbka

Using writing as a tool to carve the stone of self expression.