Vomiting Blood

rbka
2 min readOct 19, 2022

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There are no voices anymore, only screams
You have disappeared, your body is ash,
With my breath, I shriek,
Crumble on the floor
I vomit blood.

My throat is red, the crimson pain boils
On the verge of existence, my eyes widen,
I can’t see in the dark, the pain
Rips my self apart, I feel a pulling sensation
As my body and soul detaches,
I vomit blood.

Comprehending the occurrence of death,
Your passing, is a blasphemy
A psychosomatic torture, in which there is no remorse
I feel, there is no redemption, it’s a lie
In which the self takes a crafted comfort,
I vomit boiling blood.

I want to be with you, wherever you are,
Death and life, matters to me no more
They are just words, as I can’t see, I can’t feel, I don’t hear anymore,
Split from my body, my spirit is hatching
From a shell crumbling down in blood,
I’m on the floor, and I vomit blood.

There is no remedy, for the demons are here,
Along with the angels they scream, I hear them
Coming down on me, the great descent,
In which the damnation manifests,
A body, on the floor, without a throat,
Vomiting blood.

Torn asunder, the human psyche,
Cannot process the mental pain
As the body disintegrates, slowly, it gives in
It was all in vain, this life spent on Earth
The soft feet, walking, the gentle heart
Pounding, it’s all pouring down,
In a gushing vomit of pain.

I called you, Father, when I saw the gates,
You appeared, and walked among the walls
Varnished in the red pain,
My body was the paint, the earth was the canvas,
I saw darkness, then your face,
Emerging from the light, but now it is all
On the other side, which in here,
Is turned to ash and dust,
The mind, the human system,
Has reached it’s capacity, there isn’t more
That it can take, hence it retreats to non-existence,
Where there is only a wish, to feel nothing, to become the void
In this floor, sitting in cold blood, without you,
Splitting abruptly in half
I vomit blood.

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rbka
rbka

Written by rbka

Using writing as a tool to carve the stone of self expression.

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